Thoughts to Help You Through the Week

Monday September 13, 2010

There’s a truth you need to know, Mom. You need to repeat it, believe it, and let it permeate your heart.

You’re important – valuable and significant.

You mean so much to the life of your family. Think of all you do for the family – it’s not hard! We make a list of these things in our heads when we feel underappreciated.

But there’s more to mothering than laundry and loading the dishwasher:

You help mend broken hearts and wounded feelings.
You teach conflict resolution.
You encourage, cheer, lift up.
You introduce little hearts and minds to the wonder of life.
You love, even in the face of rolled eyes or constant bickering.

At this point, you may be thinking, “Oh, I usually do, but I really blew that one today.”

Who doesn’t? Which leads me to the other thought you need to make yours today.

It doesn’t all hinge on you.

Yes, you’re valued – in fact, invaluable to your child’s heart. But all of his or her life does not hinge on you. There are – and will be – other influences in your child’s life that will make a big impression. And that’s good. In His grace, God has provided for our kids. But you’re not the sole provision.

So don’t try to be it all, do it all. At first you have to provide so much for a helpless little one, but even then – let Dad do what he can do. As your son or daughter grows, lead and guide and finally, assume the role of coach – not actually in the game, but cheering and supporting and helping with the game plan at times. You can take on that coach role someday only if you’ve stepped back little by little along the way.

Loosen your grip. Let him try. He may fail, but he’ll learn. You’ll be there, cheering him on. Someone else may lend the first hand to help him up at times, but that’s okay. And sometimes, he’ll get up on his own. But he’ll turn and look for your affirming smile.

Remember this week – you are oh-so-valuable. But the good news is, it doesn’t all hinge on you.

So little by little, loosen your grip.

Do you struggle with being everything for your child? How do you find the strength to let go?


Anna K. said...

I do struggle with that! I think I'd be worried if it was too easy to let our boys go, though. ;o)

Thanks for posting this. I needed to read those words!

LauraLee said...

Yes, thank you! This was great encouragement for me today!

alicia said...

This is exactly what I needed... thank you so much for sharing! Not that I'll let go, but maybe loosen up a bit. ;)

Diane said...

God's grace has to fill in. There is no way I can even dream to think I can do it all. Good reminder! :O)

Julie Gillies said...

There are ALWAYS such wise words here, Laura. You are a tremendous blessings to moms in the blogosphere!

Hey, I just posted your interview on my blog. Hope your book is doing well!


Candra Georgi said...

I struggle with a high standard i set for be it all. To read enough to them, cook well enough for them, and everything in between. It's hard to remember the most important thing I do for them is BE with them and LOVE them with the goal that they will KNOW Him intimately one day [and I don't lose my salvation in the mean time, ha ha].


Rebecca Ramsey said...

This is so good to hear! We all need the reminder that it doesn't all hinge on us. Thank the Good Lord!
Thanks, Laura. I needed that today!

Sara said...

Thanks Laura. It was so nice to read your post. It is also comforting to know that our children and even our husband are only on loan. They are not truly ours but God's and we are blessed to be a part of their lives.

My 6 year old son was so happy yesterday when I told him he didn't have to pick the girl he wanted to marry right away...He could wait till he was at least 18 if he wanted and that was just fine. He was also relieved to know that the girl he is fond of right now may like him someday (she has no idea).
My 4 year old son says he won't get married cause he wants to be a soldier and go save people's lives. :-) The cares of their young hearts already. They need our prayers for sure.

Hyacynth said...

Stopping by from Corinne's and thanking God I did. Been struggling with raising my 3-year-old boy this past few weeks because he's so into bad guys and sword fighting and insist on being a bad guy instead of a good guy {and, oh, I think you get it}, and I needed to hear today that it doesn't all fall on me. There's someone much greater who is shaping His heart. I have a part, but it doesn't all hinge on me. Thank God for that.
Looking forward to checking out your book.

Anonymous said...

I'm making my way over from Corinne's place, and I'm so excited to get to know you better. I have two very young boys, 18 months and 4 years. I never imagined I would be raising boys, but I am so wonderfully delighted with them. I have to say, though I have my fair share of troubles, this is one area that I think I do well. I don't believe I'm the only one who can love my children and feel their lives are enriched by all the others who care for them and make a difference in their life. This is a very important post! Thank you.

Michelle DeRusha said...

Wise words here, Laura!

BTW, I just talked to a mom who saves her to-do lists long after she has finished the items listed -- she said it's an account of her life, so someone someday will know she made a difference and did something every day! I told her that someone someday is going to find those old to-do lists and think, "Look at this crazy lady who kept all these old chore lists in a file!" and then they'll toss them! (she didn't think it was quite as funny as I did).

Shannon Dingle said...

Mmm, good words here. Lately I've been struck by the awesome responsibility that God entrusted my husband and I with when he let us be the parents to our two blessings. Not overwhelmed by it, just struck by it - but, either way, it's nice to be reminded that He isn't asking us to shoulder that by our own strength. I think more than anything else, parenting teaches me the truth of God's words written by Paul that when I am weak, then He is strong.

Sara said...

To Graceful...the poor woman who had the saved lists...God knows what we've done...our children will grow up and when they become parents will remember so much of what we did (when we didn't realise they were watching). We don't need a list. We could save a list of what we've prayed for and see how God has worked and then look back years later and see His hand in everything.

Heather said...

Thanks for writing this post. I was glad that I came across it today, it helped :)

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