The First Step: Hear It on Sunday

Monday June 13, 2011

“Come close to me,” Joseph said to his brothers (Gen. 45:4).

The brothers who had considered killing him.
Who discussed leaving him in a well to die.
The brothers who sold him to a slave trader.

Yet when they stood before him in need, not knowing this official was their brother, Joseph made a choice.

He chose to forgive.

On Saturday I participated in a new meme to me (Saturday Centuris), and the prompt was “The wall was built long ago.” That short little journey into prose took me to the land where forgiveness stands on one side and bitterness on the other. Then Sunday morning Pastor Larry drove it home with his observations about Joseph and forgiveness.

Pastor outlined five lessons we can learn about forgiveness from Joseph:

1. Forgiveness does you a favor. When we refuse to forgive, we often talk about fairness. We may think, “How fair is it for that person to be forgiven when they’ve caused so much hurt?” But consider this: How fair is it for them to continue to hurt you? I finished a novel this afternoon in which a character said, “I will no longer give the past any power to ruin my present and future.”

2. Forgiveness requires meekness, not weakness. So often we see the one who forgives as being weak, being the first to give in. Weakness doesn’t forgive; weakness can do nothing. Meekness, on the other hand, can do, but it chooses not to. Pastor said this morning that the Greek word for meek is the word used in speaking of bridling a horse. Meekness is power under control. Forgiveness isn’t weak; it’s making a controlled effort to do the right thing.

3. One who forgives should not be a fool. Interestingly enough, Joseph sent his brothers back to tell his father the news that he was alive; he didn’t offer to ride off with them. These were, remember, the brothers who had sold him into slavery. Wisdom told Joseph not to place himself in a vulnerable position with those who had hurt him.

4. Forgiveness means never having to hear “I’m sorry.” (No, that’s not a quote from the 70s movie, Love Story.) We can fully forgive without having to hear the words, “I’m sorry.” While we were yet sinners, Christ died for us (Romans 5:8). He didn’t wait to hear “I’m sorry” first; He willingly extended forgiveness from the cross.

5. Forgiveness is a journey. For Joseph, this was a journey of 25 to 30 years. Yes, sometimes forgiveness can take time. And time heals; I can attest to that. We forgive to the limit that we can; we learn and grow closer to the Lord, and then we forgive some more.

There’s a chapter in I'm Outnumbered called “A Band of Brothers.” I open that chapter with the story of Joseph and his brothers, and to paraphrase myself a bit, I write:

“The application for today’s mom? [Insert woman, if it works better for you.]
Consider Joseph’s words to his brothers: ‘You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good, to accomplish . . . the saving of many lives’ (Gen. 50:20). No matter where you are in the parenting marathon [in life] or what has gone on before, God is able to take it all and use it for good . . .”

Yes, He is able. But first, we have to let go. We have to open our hands and give it up.

We have to take the first step on that journey of forgiveness.

Linking up today with Michelle at Graceful for Hear it on Sunday, Use it on Monday.

The Wall: Saturday Centus

Saturday June 11, 2011


I'm linking up with Jenny Matlock today for Saturday Centus. It's usually a 100-word write, but this week the word count was increased to 200 and a prompt was given. The prompt? Begin with "The wall was built long ago." You'll see Jenny's button at the bottom of the post if you'd like to link up anytime this week.

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The wall was built long ago.

Fashioned of bitterness, hurtful words, grudges long held. It had stood so long that I often forgot it was there.

Lately, though, the wall beckoned me. What could it be like on the other side?

I could see a hint of sun through a crack or two, and I thought of the freedom that lay just over the barrier.

But was it worth it?

I was happy over here…kind of. Life could be counted on; it was predictable. But my space seemed limited, confining. I knew those bricks would not come down without a fight. I’d have to reach inside and let go.

Let go of bitterness, angry memories, preconceived notions that had taken on a reality of their own. I took a deep breath, reached out, and, with my knuckles, I sought an edge, a crack that I could use to make an opening. Again I tried, but nothing moved.

Looking down at my bruised knuckles, I stretched my fingers just a bit. Ignoring the tear I felt inside, I felt a rush of fresh air that blew the pain away. My fingers began to uncurl slowly, aching for freedom. With an open hand, I grasped a brick and plucked it out as it it were air. The sweet sound of crumbling followed my first steps into freedom.

Breakfast on the Beach: Hear It on Sunday, Use It on Monday

Monday May 2, 2011

He said, "I don't know Him." He denied Him, over and over again. Yet in the distance a fire burns, and a meal prepared by the Lord Christ Himself awaits. Can you imagine?

The story is told by John, “the disciple whom Jesus loved.” John sees the man on the beach and hears his instruction, just like the other disciples. But as John surveys the fish in that net, he remembers an earlier miraculous catch (Luke 5:1-11). “It is the Lord!” he exclaims to Peter.

When Peter heard it was Christ, why didn't he run, cower, or hide? Because he knew Christ’s heart. After all, Jesus had predicted Peter’s betrayal, and it had come to pass. The Lord knew of what He spoke. Although Peter had betrayed Him, the disciple knew this was a heart of love, of grace, of forgiveness. He knew it was a heart that knew all things – and still provided a miraculous catch and breakfast on the beach.

So he jumped from that boat and swam into the arms of grace.

Christ addresses Peter as Simon, reverting to his earlier name. Perhaps this was a challenge to his devotion – Is he still the rock-solid Peter? Then the Lord asks three questions, allowing Peter to restore himself from his three denials. They sit round a fire, reminiscent of the one Peter warmed himself by when he betrayed his Lord. How these things must have seared Peter’s heart!

The Lord’s three questions are fodder for even more reflection, but Peter’s response, finally, is telling. “You know I love you” shows Peter’s acknowledgement of Christ’s omniscience, His power over all. Peter’s surrender and Christ’s grace-filled commission on that early morning beach leaves a few reminders for us:

Sometimes others recognize Him before we do, so we must listen to others who love Him as Peter listened to John.

He makes provisions for us even before we recognize Him. Before we can even imagine, the coals are warm, the bread baked and the fish is on the fire. All we have to do is come.

He continues to challenge us. He lets us feel pain and grieve, but it’s a wholesome, healing grief. The Lord didn’t soft-pedal Peter’s past – those three questions and the fire must have served as reminders. But in the end, this was a time of growth and restoration for Peter.

Our encounters with Him are marked by His grace and His love. What did Peter take away?

That he was loved, forgiven. That enabled him to live the proof of the assertions he had made that day, for the rest of his life.

His invitation is not only for Peter; it’s open to all.
So swim into the arms of grace today.

Linking up today with Michelle at Graceful for Hear it on Sunday, Use it on Monday.